The only child at risk for adult personality disorder
They are the unique treasures of their parents. The family puts all their expectations on them and puts them under tremendous pressure. They can’t bear it and have personality deviations. In this way, the only child has become the owner of all students in the school.
They have superior material conditions and intelligent minds, but due to various reasons, more and more only children are showing psychological and behavioral problems.
According to the latest statistics from the Ministry of Health, it was about 3.
At least 30 million of the 400 million minors under the age of 17 have various learning, emotional and behavioral disabilities.
Surveys have shown that the prevalence of mental disorders in primary and middle school students is 21.
6% to 32%, prominently manifested as problems in interpersonal relationships, emotional stability and learning adaptation.
Experts point out that due to the unique position of the only child in the family, parents lack awareness and psychological preparation for this particularity, which brings about some new issues worth exploring.
Among the three types of people with relatively concentrated socio-psychological problems, the only child is one of them.
25% of consultants have potential personality disorder Crisis intervention hotline of Wuhan Psychological Hospital shows that since the previous year, the number of potential consultants with personality disorder has increased significantly, currently accounting for about 25% of all consultants, most of them are only childrenFemale, although their family conditions are superior, their psychological problems have not been recognized, and most of them have symptoms for many years.
Yesterday, the reporter learned from Wuhan’s 12355 youth help desk that it had been in operation for more than a year and received nearly 3,000 consultation calls for help, more than 70% of which involved adolescents’ mental health problems, and some had already shown the possibility of significant personality disorders.Requires professional psychotherapy.
Wuhan University Zhongnan Hospital recently screened dozens of middle schools in Qingshan District, Wuchang District, and found that 8% of middle school students have a possibility of personality disorder, which is higher than 5.
National average of 6%.
Xiao Jinsong, associate professor of the psychological counseling office of the hospital, said that the potential for personality disorders generally appears in childhood, and persists, is fixed, and strengthens during the long-term development. It is particularly obvious during puberty. If you do not interfere, stable personality disorders will form after 18It is difficult to completely change.
Foreign students wash their feet in a foot treatment shop. Xiaogang (a pseudonym), 16 years old, was born in a senior intellectual family in Wuchang District. His parents are both medical doctors.
Xiaogang was clever and clever from an early age, with very good grades.
Usually his parents are very fond of Xiao Gang and have always satisfied him materially, but because of his busy work, he rarely asks about his study and life.
When he graduated from primary school, Xiao Gang was admitted to a key boarding school in Wuhan with excellent grades.
But it didn’t take long for Xiaogang’s parents to answer the teacher’s phone call and said that Xiaogang didn’t listen to the class and often skipped classes to go online.
The teacher looked for his personality, and he also talked back, thinking that the teacher taught nothing, he had his own learning method, and did not need to listen to the teacher.
My parents tried to persuade their son, but did not expect Xiao Gang to say, “You are like teachers, you have nothing to do, you are not qualified to teach me, I will definitely be better than you in the future.
“After barely insisting on reading for a year, a foreign middle school came to school to recruit students, and Xiao Gang was admitted with the first place.
But then living abroad, he encountered unprecedented setbacks.
Because foreign scoring methods are different from domestic ones, Xiao Gang always fails.
He was unable to communicate and cooperate well with his classmates and could not make friends.
In 2006, Xiaogang returned to China for the summer vacation and ran away as soon as he entered the customs. His parents looked around without a message.
He did not return home until last year. He told his parents that he had been washing feet in a pedicure shop. He had wanted to break out of the world, but it was not easy.
After returning home, Xiao Gang became very autistic, so he began to receive psychological counseling.
Xiao Jinsong: Xiao Gang has a clear tendency to narcissistic personality disorder. First of all, his parents are too doting, causing him to be overly conceited, which causes psychological and behavioral deviations.
When he encountered setbacks, he immediately adopted extreme negative avoidance, showing social barriers and environmental adaptation barriers.
Lin Jun, a 24-year-old graduate student (pseudonym), was washing dishes in a restaurant. He was 1 in height.
78 meters, looks like a talent, graduated from a prestigious university in Wuhan this year, and passed the 8th level in English.
Lin Jun’s father is the boss of a company and his family environment is very good.
In the eyes of classmates, relatives and friends, his life is almost perfect.
After graduating from school, Lin Jun himself found a job outside and left early every day.
But it is strange that when he comes back from work every day, he always has a strong smell of soot. His family asked him what kind of work he has been refusing to say.
One morning, Lin Jun went out to work as usual. The family followed him and saw him enter a small individual restaurant.
The family followed up and found that Lin Jun was squatting on the kitchen floor to wash dishes. It turned out that he had been working as a handyman in this restaurant. His monthly salary was less than 500 yuan.
”I can only do this. I can’t do anything else.Lin Jun explained to his family.
Later, his family introduced him to several jobs. He refused to go. He only wanted to wash dishes in the restaurant. Even after being fired, he changed jobs in several restaurants of the same type.
The family desperately turned to a counselor.
Wang Zhihui, the person in charge of the psychological intervention hotline of Wuhan Psychological Hospital: After psychological counseling, Lin Jun was found to have an inferiority complex and an avoidable comprehensive personality disorder. The reason was that he felt very inferior to his parents when he divorced at the first grade, and always felt that others looked down on him.
He studied hard, hoping to get the respect of others with his outstanding achievements, but in fact, his inferiority complex was getting worse, he was extremely unconfident about himself, and lacked a sense of security. He even wanted to close himself, fear, refuse, avoid andOutside communication.
Li Xiurong, the head of Wuhan’s 12355 adolescent help desk, said the parents were taking medicine. When counseling the adolescents, they found that more than 80% of the children had psychological problems. The problems were with their parents.
The child’s problems can reflect the problems of the family, can reflect the parent’s education, and even parents’ psychological problems.
At present, there are three kinds of family situations that have the greatest psychological impact on children: one is that parents have high expectations of their children, the other is that parents do not care about their children, and the third is that the relationship between husband and wife is bad.
She said that the biggest breakthrough in psychological counseling for children is the poor parental self-reflection ability.
Even so, parents have begun to pay attention to their children’s mental health, but they have not paid enough attention, and it is easy to ignore their children’s psychological changes.
Only when the child’s condition is serious enough to affect his or her education will parents notice it. At this time, they often simply think that the child is too naughty and disobedient, instead of finding the root cause of the child’s psychological problems.
In addition, some parents have their own psychological problems, even worse than their children, but they do not reflect on themselves and cause harm to their children.
“The child is sick and the parents are taking medicine.
“This is the treatment that counselling teachers have always claimed,” she said.
The only child is a high-risk group of personality disorders. Xiao Jinsong said that family education in childhood and parenting styles are important reasons for personality disorders.
The only child bears more expectations of the parents, more social responsibilities and pressure, the parents give them more love, and at the same time they unconsciously want to ask for more, such as honor, face, etc., so that the child feels extremelyUnbalanced and asymmetric, which leads to rebellion, so the only child is a high-risk group of personality disorders.
The study found that different parenting styles lead to different personality problems in children: parents are stronger or the relationship between parents is tense, children are more likely to develop anxiety, avoidance, and impulsive personality disorders; parents are more indifferent, and children are more likely to become divided,Social personality disorder; parents are too doting, children are prone to narcissism, dependent personality disorder.
Adolescence is the best time to intervene. A large number of studies and surveys have pointed out that personality disorders usually begin before the age of 15.
Early childhood education is important for the prevention of personality disorders.
”When your child has a personality disorder, he needs to intervene in time.
Xiao Jinsong said that before the age of 18, personality disorders may be constant and can be changed and reversed.
When a child enters puberty, he gradually replaces his parents’ ideas with his own ideas. At this time, the potential manifestation of personality disorder is the most obvious, and it is also the best time for psychological counseling and intervention.
Studies have found that with proper counselling and intervention, 60% of children can return to normal after adulthood, and 90% of conditions will improve significantly.
There are two ways to intervene: First, the family environment and education methods must be changed. Parents must adopt the correct education methods to establish a healthy family environment. Alternatives, relationships with teachers, classmates, and school education methods can easily become childrenCauses of psychological problems, so teachers can not only acknowledge the transfer of knowledge and student performance, but also pay attention to the cultivation of adolescents’ healthy personality.
He said that after the formation of personality disorders, correction of positive controls requires long-term and stable psychological treatment. The basic principle is to slowly promote personality changes under the replacement of stable psychological conditions, and usually requires professional psychologist intervention.